Because It Hurt so Much
by sanadayuina
Summary: Kaname feel pity, that for sure. That girl really does deserve Kaname's pity. Family's betrayal is the most hurtful betrayal, after all. KanameXOC


_**Because It Hurt so Much**_

A teenager, about 15 or 16 years old is running in the dark road. She starts cursing something or someone when she stopping and sit on one of the park chair. "Damned father of mine, damn you to hell and back! If I can disown you, I will. Right now. How can you told me to do all you want and don't even ask what I want… and look at yourself! Cheater! Hah!" she mumbling to herself, burying her face to the palm of her sweating hands.

Her dark hair, styled to make people mistake her as a boy, still wet and her dark coat is wrinkled as if she didn't taking a good care of it. Her dark brown eyes is red, still rather wet and containing unshed tears, and the only reason she able to hold her tears now is only because she is in the public park. Even though the park is already empty and only people with dire need will come to there—but it will be better if the girl being cautious now. It will do her bad if someone she know coming there and catch her crying like a little girl she really is.

"Miss, it is already dark. It is dangerous for a girl like you outside alone. Or there is a reason why you are here? Crying by yourself?"

She chocking back a sob, looking up the a stranger who—without her knowing and noticing—standing in front of her.

"What it is to you?" she snarling, angry and pissed—not only because a random stranger dare to disturb her pitying-self time, but also noticed and pointed out something she hope no one noticed.

Especially… why she is here is none of his business. It is a public park and free country. She is free to… oh, damn.

"Well, nothing to me, actually," he says softly, stepping closer and bend down to staring in the eye level of the girl, smiling slightly. "Curiosity killed the cat, I guess."

The girl gazing back at the wine colored eyes before her eyes widen and she pulling herself behind tried to make more distance between them. She can't help it! Who will not feel embarrassed and want to put more distance if being gazed with that kind of intense and beautiful eyes? Especially if the stranger is this handsome… especially with that pale complexion and wavy, shoulder-length hair that look so soft. Beautiful… sinfully handsome and beautiful in the same time.

"Well, if you do not mind… What are you doing here?" he asks again before straighten his back and walking to side beside the girl in the park-bench.

"I do mind," she says sarcastically, wiping her eyes furiously in the same time.

"Mind if I sat next to you?" he says, intertwining his finger in his lap in a graceful gesture that the girl can't even hope to arcieve.

"You already did," she says, leaning back and close her eyes. "… and it is a public park. You don't ask permission to do something like that.

The man chuckles softly, shaking his head and whispering something about manner.

The girl flinch, keeping her eyes tightly shut. She did not need another person commenting of her lack of manner. Or any manner in general. And she didn't really wary about the man… okay, she lies. She know she is scared—scared of who the man is and what he want to do with her. But, really, the man will not do something to endanger her—sorta. He look rich, and handsome—he can get everything he wanted so it is close to none change that he is a criminal. Except if he is a serial killer.

But killed is better, maybe. That will make her father feel sorry and blame himself if something wrong happened to her.

A wild smirk appears in the tanned-because-the-sun face. Oh, die or getting hurt and make her father beg for forgiveness sound so tempting right now. Maybe that cheater will stop if he know what he drive his older daughter to.

"… me …"

"What?" she says, snapping open her eyes in surprise and look to the side where the handsome man sit.

"Kuran Kaname, that's my name," he says, look back at her with the same calm expression he wear since he first calling to her. "You?"

"Hime, just call me that. I don't want to say my family name… no, I don't think I _can_ says that name. Not after what he did… what my father did… still do… family is… false… I guess," she says, not sure why she give her name and half the reason why she is here… babbling… to some stranger. While he, indeed, a handsome fellow, he is still a stranger. Weren't her mother once told her not to talk and give her name to stranger?

"Why?"

"Because that damn bastrad dare to turn his back to us… something that he once said as his family… the name I have to share to him… the name he gave me!" she says in a rush, look at Kaname with eyes narrowing in anger—start talking without thinking that she ought to feel sorry and embarrassed later when she finally come to her sense. "Because I hate to born as his child! Like I never want to be his child! He is the one who want me and then… and then… he… I _am_ a bastrad child. Figuratively and literally. 'Gifted' to them before the officially so they _could_ married… but then he throw us away. Betray us. Betray the 'family' he once wanted… ugh…."

The teenager, Hime, suddenly feel tears spilling from her eyes. She then close her eyes tightly while biting her lips—willing the tears to go away. She don't want… she don't want anyone see her in this kind of state…

Kaname blinking slowly, taking how the girl forced back sobs and rubbing her eyes furiously as if she don't want anyone to see her tears.

"… Let me?" Kaname says and—before the dark haired girl can answer or understand what he said—take Hime's shoulder and press Hime face to his own shoulder using his other hand. "Cry as much as you can... don't worry, I can't see you this way."

Hime chocks on her own saliva before sniffling and burying her face in the man broad shoulder. Hime is big for a girl, especially one in her age—but the man somewhat able to wrap his arms around her and although the crying teen flinching from the strange warm, so unlike her mom's warm, but somewhat… she feel comforted.

Kaname look past the girl back, to the night, although his eyes didn't process what he see. His mind strangely only focused at the sniffling and pathetic human in his arms.

Why she crying? What make her cry? Is being betrayed by her own father hurt that much? Kaname never know.

But, Kaname want to know… why he feel obligated to come to her and start comforting this human… weak human who only can cry…

"Thanks," Hime mumbles when her tears finally stopped—voice hoarse. But, she still hide her face in Kaname shoulder, not daring to look at the man and close her eyes. Too comfortable in those arms to pull back just yet… the warm that strangely remind her of her childhood when her father still hugs her in daily basic. The childhood when everything so perfect.

"No problem," Kaname says softly, glad that the tears that wetting his expensive cloak finally stopped. "Mind to tell me the exact cause of those tears? Don't tell me if you don't want, though."

The dark haired girl shakes her head, pulling back so she can look at Kaname right in the eyes again. "I think I can tell you," Hime says, wiping the remaining of her tears away. "It's not like you will tell anyone I know and I want to talk to someone about it… but my best friend who know my problem very well now have job in other city and I lost contact with him."

"You don't mind because I am a stranger?" Kaname whisper back, not sure why he want to know.

"Yup," Hime says, wrapping her arms around her body and shivering slightly. "Because… I don't know? Talking to stranger is easier and stranger… not going to point me that… that…" The brown eyed girl shakes her head, snorting at her own idiocy for not able to said what she want to said.

"Okay," Kaname says, clearly noticed the girl struggling.

"Well… how can I start? Oh, yes, I have fight with my father, _again_," Hime says. "He told me to do something I really don't want to do—not that I really mind doing that. It is just…something that people usually does from the goodness of their heart and not something forced. And especially if the one who told you to _fucking pray_ to God is someone who cheating. Who have a whore in his back and call. I can't exactly said that to him, you know. Especially because I still don't believe God _entirely_. I know there is a power outside what human mind know, spiritual and thing like that… but I seriously still don't get a proof that a God is _here_ so I don't want to pray yet and he _dare_ to told me he will never gave me money again and don't _want_ to care about me again. I says to myself, who care? It's just him! I don't give a fuck if he don't care about me anymore—as if he _ever_—or not giving me allowance again. I honestly just want to shout and cursing… and told everything I know about his damn whore—he don't know I know—in his face and the hell, I will gladly take it if he disown me. But…"

"But?" Kaname push her gently to continues.

The pureblood is honestly curious. Kaname is a good judge of personality, if he say so himself—he know that the girl is the kind of reckless human who will do just what she said if she ever get the chance. But there is something that makes her holding back. What—or who—is it? Kaname really want to know.

"When I hate my father… I care about my mother," she says, silent tears fall again and she, this once, didn't move to wipe the tears. And although Kaname want to, he don't dare to—not when the girl smiling sadly. "If I said that, my mother is the one who will get blamed by my father. He is so egoist and never think he is the one whom make me think that way. My mother is so gentle and too good for my father… but… but why he dare to do that? When he have my mother already? I will do what he wants if only he can have my trust, but no! He will never be trusted!"

Kaname can't help himself, he hug Hime and whispering something soft to make that girl calming down a bit. "He betrayed my mother! Betrayed our family and he still dare to order me to do something I don't want to? How dare he? How dare he make me to do that and he still do something that can't be forgiven? I cannot forgive him! He has other woman… and he tells me to pray to God? He NEVER has place and rights to say that to me! He don't!"

Kaname is stunned from the fierceness and hatred in the girl' voice. Something that he only ever feel from Zero's voice. He then ask softly, pitying the girl, "… how can you know?"

"Oh, I know as much as he thinks I don't know. _Everything._ He thought I don't know anything, oh, how naïve he can be!" Hime says softly, inhaling a large gulp of air before continues in calmer tone. "I could tell he acted strange after he have his old ex-girlfriend number and start have some calls from that women! Oh, and I ask my mother, my mother said, yes, my father have an affair with his fucking ex-girlfriend! And she told me not to told anyone because she not want my father to feel embarrassed if this getting out to open! I really want to said that I don't care, honestly!"

Suddenly, the dark haired girl laughing loudly—make Kaname wonder how unstable she really is right now.

"I stay silent only because my mother told me so. But this night is the horrible one and my mother not helps me even for a bit! Oh! Just how much I want told him about his affair and how he don't have any rights to told me anything he think good for me because he still don't know what is good for himself. And how much he can't raise child—look at me! I am not a good child, see? And how much my mother give to him that he throw away, and how much I hate him and what I think he is to me, only money machine! Yes! As _his_ child, I can say he did not have any character as a father for us, his children nor characters as a husband for my mother! And I can't said that because if I did that I will get disowned and my mom will be the one who get the blame and sad and I don't have any other place to stay but that house! That's why I am in this park, Kuran-san, because I want to run as long as I can and I have come to realization even before I get out of my house that I don't have other place to come back but where he is! Just how much I want to cry but can't do that in front of any of my family or friend because that will bring only more problem and don't want anybody think I am weak. Now, I cry in random stranger arms, and I really do not mind! I don't know if it get any worse. I think I am getting crazy."

Kaname is… for the lack of better word, surprised. Human is strange. They can care about something really silly and take some important problem with laugh… his touch with _real_ human or human-turned-vampire who are still sane is rare and usually never get to personal level. But, if Kaname honest to himself… he is quite interested.

"So," Kaname whisper softly. "You don't believe in God, huh?"

"I told you already," Hime says, cringing and look up at Kaname. "Why?"

"Then, Hime, are you believe is I told you I am a vampire?" Kaname asks.

The girl snorting and shakes her head. "Nope," she says. "Not without proof. I get enough of lies and jokes."

"You want to run, Hime?" Kaname asks again, smiling slightly at the amused face the girl have when look at him as if he just says a not so funny joke. "Then, if the choices are only go back to your house or the dark world… where you can have somewhere to stay… which one you choose?"

"… the dark world where I have somewhere to stay," Hime says softly, unsure why she take this man seriously. "I even want to die, sometime. But I… scared of death. And I don't want to lost to it."

"Then, will you came with me?" Kaname said, his fang now touch dangerously in Hime skin.

"As long as you not abandon me like my father," Hime whispering, eyes glazed like she is in trance.

"Good girl," Kaname whispering softly before bite Hime neck.

"Agh…" Hime cry in pain, but not moving.

She don't know. She don't understand… but there is something that told her to trust this man… vampire… but she still don't understand…

Kaname gulping the blood from Hime's vein. He notice that the blood is bittersweet. Bittersweet… like the dark chocolate Zero often make for desert in chairman's house.

This girl is pitiful. Kaname know that. She know nothing of the real world but have to faced with harsh reality from her own family.

Kaname know from the time he saw this girl sat in the bench park and whispering softly to herself or how red her eyes after cry and look blank in the darkness… he feel pity for this girl tears and broken soul.

The blood is still not satisfying for him just yet. Nor that he have any other feeling other than pity to this girl.

But he know one thing—this human is his to care now. And even if his feeling is only consisting of pity now, at least he will be able to protect her.

He want to know how this girl—newly born vampire and Kaname's pet—will look like when she is smiling genuinely.

.

**5 years later.**

**.**

Kaname walk to his pet… the one he pity yet slowly love along with the time they spend together.

He still don't know if his feeling is genuine, born only from his loneliness that yearn for companionship or born from the pity. But, he don't care. He have someone to care now—now when his beloved sister choose to life as human—and that the most important thing.

"Hime," Kaname says softly, hug the girl from behind.

She yelping and then yell at Kaname with face flushed, "Damn Kaname! Don't to that! You know I can't detect your aura if you hide it, unlike Zero! You scared me!"

"Sorry," Kaname whispering with amusement, enjoying the girl distress and brush his pale and large hand to move the bangs that hide the brown eyes. "You are just asking to get teased and startled when you were daydreaming. Not to mention, rather cute."

"Don't call me that," plead Hime, shaking her head slowly. "If SHirabuki-sama heard you…"

"What Sara said to you?" Kaname growling softly. While Hime turned up to have strong exterior personality, but—in the inside—she often take too seriously what people says and grown depressed because of that.

And Kaname didn't need his mate to feel more inferior that she already feel because her status as a mere level D. While Kaname agree that she hold no beauty like Sara, Seiren, or Ruka have—nor cuteness like Yuuki or Rima held—she is not ugly either.

"Nothing," the girl says simply, shaking her head. "Forget it. I am not saying anything."

"Don't said that," whisper Kaname, bend down to press his nose to her neck. "Don't look down at yourself. You are not low... stop thinking like that. Stop take everything Sara said to heart."

"But, she is right, you know…" Hime says again, leaning back to Kaname. Her eyes now rest at the beautiful lake in the garden in front of the Kuran mansion.

"No," Kaname denying it quickly. "You are not."

"I a, just a level D, Kaname… I do think that this is better than my life as human, but I still the lower on the vampire pyramid, so…"

"But you are the higher in mine," Kaname says. "Well, except maybe from Yuuki's position." And the girl chuckling, shaking her head while inwardly feeling hot jealously in her stomach. "Is that not enough for you?"

"It's the fifth year, Kaname," Hime says, avoiding the question. "It's my 20th birthday as human and 5th birthday as vampire…"

"Mmm?" Kaname humming softly, circling his arms around her shoulders—noticing that she don't answer his question but let it go. "What you want for present, then?"

"Can I meet my family?"murmur Hime so softly that if Kaname not vampire he won't be able to heard her.

But, he did. And he don't like it.

"But… why? You said you do not want to remember… I think you said you want to forget your life as human… you say you will never leave my side…"

"Who want to leave you?" Hime growl angrily, shakes Kaname's arms away from her shoulders. "Get off, you are heavy."

"What?" Kaname ask, confused.

Hime sighing tiredly and pinch Kaname's hand who now resting in her shoulder before saying, "I want to say goodbye to my mother and see if _he_ realize his idiotic act in the past."

"Are you sure?" Kaname says, look down to the brown eyes who still held some longing of the past.

"Yup," Hime says softly. "I said that I just want to say goodbye, wasn't I?"

"Well, then," he says, giving up. "But not today. Zero comes with Yuuki and Kurosu, and I think the others will come too to celebrate your birthday, so you have to meet them first."

"Dinning together again, Kaname?" Hime groaning, look up at the full moon. "Don't. Good. I really hate dinning together with everyone…"

"Ahahahaha, don't say that, Hime-chan," Ichijou Takuma and Shiki Senri, Hime two favorite vampires come from the mansion. "We will think you hate our company all together. And Aido still think that you hate him with your careless comment last time."

"Sorry to be a level D whom can't have respect to level B," Hime says sarcastically.

"Don't say that," Senri says, glance to his back. "We know you and Aidou are friends. Somewhat. Just because Sara-san jealous you always with the dorm lead… sorry, Kaname-san, not like the other think of you like that to. Like… some low being…"

"Nice words, Senri," Hime says genuinely, smiling brightly at the sleepy-eyed vampire while waving her hand to someone behind him. "Yo, Zero, how was your day?" she says to Zero who smirking at her back.

"As boring as ever. You?" Zero says.

"Same as you," Hime says, extended her hand that Zero accept and shooks.

"As emo as ever."

"I prefer emo than flamboyant, Aidou," Hime says to the blond vampire whom appears suddenly behind Zero back.

"Can we start the diner?" Zero ask Kaname. "Yuuki been whining."

"Sure," Kaname says. "You don't mind, right, Hime?"

"If I mind, will you ever listen to me and stop things like this?" she says sharply, ready to bite Kaname.

"As long as I think this good for you I will never stop…"

"… I hate you…"

.

Hime and Kaname stand in front of the house. The house Hime used to live for 15 years. "Ah, I fell I want to go home," Hime mumbling and gripping Kaname's coat sleeve. "This place makes me sick."

"Don't said that," Kaname sighing and pat the much younger vampire's back. "You are the one who want to come here."

"I know… but…" Hime pouting childishly.

Kaname rich laugh that followed the comment stopping abruptly when the front door behind the gate suddenly opened—show the two vampires a teenage girl that looking back at them with wide eyes.

That girl look shocked before she look back and cried at someone in home, "Oka-san, Otoo-san, Nee… Nee-san back!"

Hime groaning, palming her forehead when the wavy haired girl look at them again. "Oh, God, the one whom can make the whole neighbors woke up from their peaceful sleep."

"Who is she?" Kaname ask, studying the girl carefully.

"My little sister," Hime informs the man. "You don't need to voice out that she look nothing like me. I already know, thank you very much."

"If you insist… sure," Kaname says softly, still looking to the curly feminism girl whom shouted, '_That's true! Look by yourself if you don't believe me!'_

Then, a man and a woman standing in front door too, make Hime eyes narrowed dangerously. "Good evening," Hime says, tilt her head haughtily. "Sorry to disturb your… night."

"What?" the man suddenly shouted, face pale. "Who are you? You look like my older daughter when she disappeared… but…"

"Oh, so you do noticed?" Hime humming thoughtfully. "Glad to know you are not complete idiot… father. I am Kuran Hime, nice to meet you."

"Kuran?' the man says, growling dangerously. "You…" he then looks to Kaname, eyes hold anger and disappointment. "You are the one who take my daughter, aren't you?"

"Yes I am," Kaname confirming calmly, not even flinching when the man let out a scream of outrage.

"No, he is not," Hime quickly defend Kaname. "I, as your daughter long time ago, come to him and let him take me, the one who makes me to do that is your selfish self."

"Me?"

"Yes, you and your selfish action," Hime says, nodding. "I come only to say goodbye, because I don't think in other time I fell like to come… you are going to be alive."

"What do you mean?" her sister squeaking behind her mother back.

"Oh, just natural things. Human and their time," Hime says, wave her hand sarcastically.

"Why?" Her mother finally asks, look to her long lost child with yearning clear in her beautiful eyes. "Why you disappeared? We think you die…"

"Oh, I really did die, my old self die that day," Hime says. "And why I was leaving? Wasn't that simple? I tired of you all, especially to him. Oh, I really tired."

Kaname grab Hime's wrist, look to her family with gaze that can make hell froze. "Your time up, Hime," Kaname murmuring softly. "You do understand that it will be the last time you ever see them again, right?"

"Yes," Hime nodding. "One thing again," Hime look at her family who stand together behind the gate that separated them and give them a soft smile. "I am glad… you are okay... Mum, Dad, Sis… and, goodbye."

"Goodbye," Kaname says too, tug Hime to the waiting limo.

"_Sayonara_."

"Nee-san!"

Hime cover her ears to block her sibling's voice that beg her to come back, leaving the driver to close the limo's door.

"Is this, finally, okay?" Kaname ask, chin in his palm and eyes on Hime.

"Yes," the young dark haired vampire says, closing her brown eyes and lean to Kaname shoulder.

Kaname can tell that the instant Hime leaning on him, she already lost concussions, sighing sadly. "Good night," whisper Kaname softly. "Our time together is not long. Not going to be longer that hundred years. But you… are my important family. Ever and ever…"

.

.

.**THE END**

**A/N: This is the re-write version. I think it is better that before… well, sorta. It is been two years, after all. And I already growing up, ahahaha! My family now… never back to our condition before, but I can said that I don't really care anymore.**

**This is quite different with the first version. Hime is more… unstable and cursing less here. And the fast confession is nowhere to be seen too. Yay! XD**

**I hope you enjoy this story.**

**Love,**

**sanadayuina**


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